A history of sexual violence can create an ideal environment for a variety of mental-health issues, addiction, and alcoholism. Often, the triggering event or events are hidden in the annals of one’s mind and perceived as shameful, deep, dark secrets too horrible to share…with anyone. As a result, drugs, alcohol, and risk-taking behaviors are often seen as the primary issue when one enters treatment. Time and again, we see that this isn’t always the case; That becomes clear when we look at it in terms of statistics: One out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an …

Image via Wikipedia Drug addiction and alcoholism could care less about your income, social status, ethnicity, or education. Both tend to be equal-opportunity destroyers. At the same time, alcoholism and addiction can certainly be the catalyst to finding yourself suffering from job loss, a fall in social status, becoming impoverished, and of course living the imminent crash-and-burn lifestyle that’s part and parcel to addiction. There are myriad stories of successful people finding themselves losing everything as a result of their addictions, having thrown their lives away in the name of getting drunk or high. For them, having wealth and success …

Image via Wikipedia Recovery needs to be safe. It needs to be a place where we can shed our layers of fear and self-loathing and learn to be good enough as we are. It needs not to be the predatory place it’s become, where young girls learning to navigate a sober path to recovery end up falling prey to older men acting out their rescue fantasies (or worse). The notion of the 13th step (the unwritten yet prevalent practice of someone with longer sobriety praying on the vulnerability of the newcomer of the opposite sex) is alive and well, making …

The death of Amy Winehouse, mere months after another misfired attempt at rehab leaves me thinking more and more about the misleading notion of a revolving door in recovery. I am reminded of the perceived invincibility we tend to have when we’re using and how deadly that assumption can be. Unfortunately, we’ve been subjected to inadvertent voyeurism as we’ve fallen witness to Winehouse’s public demise. As part of a recovery community, we can certainly sit and proselytize about the myriad things she could have or should have done differently, but the fact remains: she was an addict, and her addiction …

Did you know the Fourth of July has one of the highest rates of drunk driving accidents and DUIs? Did you know that there are other options to getting behind the wheel when you’re under the influence? AAA is offering their usual “Tipsy Tow” service on the Fourth of July in an effort to get drunk drivers off the road. This is great news for those of you still out there, fighting sobriety one drink or drug at a time. Another holiday is upon us, wherein we’re almost expected to imbibe. Fourth of July is geared toward BBQs, drinking, and …

The 12-step model is certainly reliable and is the standard go-to place for most people seeking recovery. It’s certainly the model we refer to first in the recovery world. However, there are times when we come across an alcoholic or addict who is deeply atheist and subsequently hits a wall when they get to Step 2: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity.” Can AA work for them too? Most people will say that it can. Some will leave things as-is, and some will need to make some minor language changes in order …

Image via Wikipedia When I think of the phrase “I’m an alcoholic,” I often think of Popeye and the fervency behind his frequently uttered catchphrase: “I yam what I yam.”  When admitting to being an alcoholic, you’re taking the first step towards admission of powerlessness. It implies an understanding that in claiming that label, one is willing to look at the mind-body connection to their drinking and using. According to the 12 and 12, “Admission of powerlessness is the first step in liberation.” It is the way those of us in 12-step recovery begin to build the foundation on which …

What do they do with the hopeless, late-stage alcoholics in Minnesota? They sometimes send them to the St. Anthony Residence, which is one of five “wet-houses” in the Twin Cities area. Wet houses are residential facilities where sobriety and recovery aren’t expected. They use a “harm-reduction” model, which employs a set of strategies meant to reduce the negative effects of alcohol (homelessness, panhandling, jail, etc.). These wet houses also provide shelter, meals, and medical attention for late-stage alcoholics. Often, their modality of thought is, “It’s safer and cheaper to have these guys drinking in a controlled environment than out on …

A recent NY Times article written by David Colman triggered a firestorm of responses by “challenging the second A in AA.” In fact, he disregards his own anonymity by beginning his own piece with, “I’m Dave, and I’m an alcoholic.” Colman says, “More and more, anonymity is seeming like an anachronistic vestige of the Great Depression, when A.A. got its start and when alcoholism was seen as not just a weakness but a disgrace.” He also brings up the vast range of celebrities who’ve used their recovery stories as fodder for books or albums, clearly stating their involvement in 12-step …

What happens when someone you love relapses and decides not to get sober again? Regardless of whether that person is a parent or a close friend, it’s a challenge, to say the least. In AA, we are told  “we simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on a higher power¹” This statement alone verifies the need to allay one’s reliance upon the static nature of the sick, and instead turn the focus on paving a new path toward healing. In 1951, Al-Anon began using the steps, giving those married to …